Let’s talk about — INDEPENDENCE.
An independent person has full autonomy or control over one’s life.
Our independence can be taken away in all kinds of ways, such as government mandates, mental health interventions (#freebritney), or as punishment for committing crimes.
We can also give away our independence through the choices we make. Parents put their children first; business trips take us away from home for days. These choices are conscious and presumably for the greater good.
People pleasers tend to give away independence without even realizing it. And this is where unhealthy habits are formed. We give away our independence every time we:
- Say yes when we want to say NO
- Change our plans to accommodate someone else
- Compromise our principles to keep the peace
- Try to win approval from others
- Allow ourselves to be manipulated
- Don’t follow our internal compass
- Take on the responsibilities of others
- Fail to honor our personal priorities
When we lose control, and give away our autonomy, we harm ourselves. The loss manifests in:
- Guilt
- Anxiety
- Lost sleep
- Stress
- Migraines
- Lower self-esteem
- Lost family time
- Lost personal time
- Financial stress
- Strained relationships
- Depression
- Lack of focus
- Loss of confidence
- Unrealized dreams
The answer to retaining our independence is to learn to put ourselves first in healthy ways — to become Thoughtfully Selfish. We can learn to:
- Give without depleting ourselves
- Set healthy boundaries
- Identify and focus on our priorities
- Live our values
- Do what makes us happy
- Say NO with confidence
- Work toward our dreams and desires
Every day should be Independence Day! Live your life on your terms. Be who you want to be. Do what you want to do. Start now.
Where in your life are you giving away your independence? How can you take it back?
If you are ready to declare your independence, let’s talk. Book a complimentary 30 minute discovery call with me at www.thoughtfullyselfish.com and start doing what makes YOU happy!
